The Challenge Made A Huge Comeback Last Night. Just Kidding, They Continued To Shove "Are You The One" Down Our Throats
For the second time this season, MTV has tickled our balls with a replacement team coming onto The Challenge. And for the second time, it was an Are You The One team. And not just any Are You The One team, but a team that was already eliminated and is boring as fuck. I don’t know if it’s because I’m old and hate change or what. But I cannot stand this Are You The One nonsense on The Challenge. So I put it up for debate on the No Quitters Twitter handle, and these were the results.
Poll don’t lie. So I am reaching out to MTV through this blog. You need help with this show. It’s dying a slow death. And it’s not all your fault. There is talent on that roster. The old Challenge veterans that myself and other longtime viewers love simply don’t have the same anger/hormones/steroids coursing through their system that they had years ago. I understand that. But they still hold their own and bring the nostalgia of an old blanket. And I also understand that some of our favorite cast members are too old/smart to come on the show. But younger characters like Jenna, Ashley, and Tony are superstars in the making.
However, this Are You The One nonsense has to end. You want to take two or three of your absolute all-stars from that show, that’s fine. But having almost half of The Challenge being filled with boring characters from a show most of us have no interest in is absurd. And if you like Are You The One, that’s fine. Those kids can be fun on a dating show. But on The Challenge, they stinnnnnnnk. If MTV wants fresh blood, they should just go back to the Fresh Meat idea and recruit people that are into competition, boozing, and fucking. Not some goddamn dating show. Kenny, Diem, Evan, Big E, Ev, Laurel, Theresa, and Cara Maria are all Fresh Meat alums. More than a few Challenge Hall of Famers in that bunch. It shouldn’t be that hard to find a bunch of crazy maniacs that would thrive on that show. Watch some of the videos on the BarstoolU Instagram page. There are nutjobs out there. Do a casting call for the best of the best in Fresh Meat and save the Challenge.
And while you are doing that, lets make the elmiinations better. More guys running through a narrow hallway where they may or may not be killed and less puzzles. Same for the challenges. Enough scaffolding hanging 500 feet above the water and more spelling challenges or challenges like this from next week (I would obviously choose eat the birthday cake).
I am here to help. Put me on the casting selection committee and the challenge/elimination round competition committee and we can #MakeTheChallengeGreatAgain. Or I will probably be planning out on retiring from watching the show in two years on some ARod, Jim Boeheim and Mike Francesa shit.
Anyway, back to the episode, not much happened. We lost Johnny Reilly, which was kind of a bummer. But on the bright side we lost Jessica. And lets just say things got awkward. The call it Rivals for a reason, kids.
But don’t get on Jessica too hard for not solving the puzzle, because she dropped this brain bomb on all the #haterz afterwards.
Because if there is anything we’ve learned, it’s that veggie preparation is TOUGH (jk, I don’t eat veggies so I really have no clue)
However, Jess did inspire a strong comeback from Tony.
Not sure if he actually meant cum or cumulative, but getting one of those things out of his body always seems to be on Tony’s mind, who is quickly going down as one of the best stickmen in Challenge history.
So obviously the episode led to a pretty lively No Quitters podcast where JJ, Connor, and I tried to figure out how to fix The Challenge. And JJ’s idea of having Bananas go around and recruit former Challenge members was one of the best I have heard in a while.